Oscar-winning composer AR Rahman has made a startling confession, revealing that his biggest global honour slowly turned into a psychological weight that pushed him into self-doubt, overwork and a relentless need to prove himself all over again.
In a candid interview with The Hollywood Reporter India, Rahman admitted that winning two Oscars came with an unexpected downside. He described the achievement as a “burden”, explaining how constant comparisons with his past work and relentless nostalgia around his 1990s music made him question his relevance and creativity.
Rahman said that over the last six years, people repeatedly praised his earlier compositions in a way that subtly undermined his present work, leaving him mentally shaken.
Recalling those conversations, he said, “For the past six years, to be frank, when people come to you, the ’90s generation have a certain nostalgia, certain affinity towards your music. The same goes for those born in 2000s, and so on for those from the next decade. They come and gaslight you. They say, “In the ’90s, you did Roja (1992). That’s very good music, sir!’ That feels like now, you’re not doing good music, right? It actually harms your thinking if you’re not in your best mood.”
The repeated implication that his best work was behind him deeply affected the composer, pushing him into a phase of extreme productivity. Rahman revealed that this emotional pressure is what drove him to take on an unusually heavy workload, composing for nearly 20 to 30 films in just the last six years.
He explained that instead of slowing down, he deliberately chose to go on what he described as a creative “rampage”, working back-to-back on projects to reclaim confidence in his present-day music. According to Rahman, many directors now cite his recent compositions, particularly his work for Mani Ratnam’s Thug Life, as reference points, most of which come from this intense six-year period. Reflecting on this phase, he said he now feels secure creatively, adding, “I’m safe now. I’ve got enough for the next generation.”
Rahman also spoke openly about how past accolades, including his Oscars, no longer motivate him. He stressed that internal validation matters far more than trophies or titles. “I love that stuff, but within me, I need to get my self-esteem and confidence back, and prove myself. What I’m doing next is going to be the best thing. Not rely on the past, and be like, ‘Oh, I've won 2 Oscars.’ That thought drains you. You’re not motivated to do anything, It can be a burden. It’s not in my Twitter or Instagram bio, no Oscar, no Grammy, nothing. It’s a fresh start, 2026,” he said.
Looking ahead, Rahman has several major projects lined up. He has composed the music for Gandhi Talks, a silent drama starring Vijay Sethupathi, directed by Kishor Pandurang Belekar and produced by Zee Studios along with Kyoorius and Moviemill. The film also features Arvind Swamy, Aditi Rao Hydari and Siddharth Jadhav, and is set for a theatrical release on January 30.
He has also worked on Nitesh Tiwari’s ambitious Ramayana, collaborating with Grammy-winning composer Hans Zimmer. The epic film stars Ranbir Kapoor, Sai Pallavi, Sunny Deol and Yash, and is scheduled to release in theatres on Diwali 2026.
Through his reflections, Rahman has laid bare a rarely discussed side of success, revealing how even the highest honours can quietly erode confidence and force an artist to fight for belief in their present work.